These perfectly squishy Fabergé grapes balance the bland brand with a popping, sundried raisin flavor that’s way more ripe and sweet than tangy or puckering. Post Raisin Bran’s titular purple nuggets are oozing with juiciness and encrusted with a thick layer of sweetly sparkling sugar. You have no idea how hard it is to survive in a wordplay penitentiary when all you want to do is call it a “punitentiary.” I might even call them bran-tastic, but I’m already on thin ice with the pun police after that first one. Imagine off-brand wheat bread crust that chilled in the clearance aisle a little too long.īut despair not, my fellow raisin bran fanboys and fangirls, for there is good news: the raisins in Post Raisin Bran are fantastic. The flakes are uncomfortably chewy and mealy, with an undercurrent of toasted whole grain, but it isn’t golden, malted, or even all that sweet. Really, they don’t taste like much at all. Though saying they taste like ancient Egyptian monsters may be giving Post Raisin Bran’s flakes too much credit. One might even say the flakes taste like they’ve been chilling in the same vacuum-sealed bag for the past 74 years, like edible mummies made of crispy, paper-thin wheat. One might say they taste stale straight out of the box. Okay fine, I guess I’ll start with the bad news: Post Raisin Bran has lame flakes.
What’s that you say? You’re on the other side of a computer monitor, hundreds of miles away and therefore can’t tell me which news you’d rather hear first, no matter how hard you yell and spook your cat? Would you like the good news or the bad news first? Not all the way back-I’ve already reviewed the first raisin bran ever created-but still back to 1942, when Post Raisin Bran debuted in the same year as Kellogg’s Raisin Bran, a simultaneous release that I can only imagine ended in West Side Story-esque rivalries between street gangs loyal to each respective bran brand.īut is Post the Raisin Bran with the most, or does Kellogg’s smiling sun melt away the competition? Time to unsheathe my spoon, ready my dental floss, and find out. Having travelled far, eaten a lot, and picked many raisins out of tricky tooth crevasses, it’s time for me to return again to raisin bran’s humble origins. I’ve been on a long quest to review every raisin bran cereal imaginable, a quest so exhaustive that I bran out of “raisin bran” puns months ago.
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